Philemon 1:15-20
No Longer as a Slave
15For perhaps this is why he was separated from you for a while, so that you might have him back for good—
16no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a beloved brother. He is especially beloved to me, but even more so to you, both in person and in the Lord.
17So if you consider me a partner, receive him as you would receive me.
18But if he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge it to my account.
19I, Paul, write this with my own hand. I will repay it—not to mention that you owe me your very self.
20Yes, brother, let me have some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ.
Berean Standard Bible
The paragraph turns on a word nobody expects from Paul. Perhaps. He has arrived at the most important thing he has to say, he is a man with a great deal to say about God's purposes, and what he hands Philemon is a suggestion: perhaps this is why Onesimus was away for a while, so that Philemon could have him back for good. Even the verb is careful. He was separated, Paul writes, and he is not going to spend a line of this letter on what the man did.
Then comes the sentence the rest of it was built to carry.
No longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a beloved brother.
It does not order Philemon to set him free. It does not announce that slavery is finished. Anybody arriving at this letter for that command will leave without it. What Paul does instead is put two things into one man's hands and walk away: here is the person you own, and here is your brother, dearly loved by Paul and more dearly still by you, in person as well as in the Lord. Not brothers on the Lord's day while the household arrangement continues the rest of the week. In the house, on an ordinary Tuesday. Nobody holds both of those for long.
Now the ask, and the word from the opening comes back with a bill attached. If you consider me a partner, Paul writes, receive him as you would receive me. He is an apostle, and he is the man Philemon owes his own self to, as he is about to remind him. The door that opens for Paul is the door that has to open for the slave he is sending back.
But if he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge it to my account.
Paul never says whether anything happened. He does not defend it, size it, or argue it down. He writes the next line in his own hand, which turns it into a signature, and undertakes to repay whatever there may be to repay. In the same breath, lightly, he mentions that Philemon owes him his very self.
Yes, brother, let me have some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ.
The other word from the opening, collected. Philemon refreshed the hearts of the saints, and Paul is asking him for one more.
How We Know
This paragraph keeps three things a cleaner appeal would have removed, and keeping them is a small reason to read the appeal as written into a live case rather than composed after one.
Verse 15 hedges. Perhaps this is why he was separated from you. The uncertainty sits in the middle of the argument and nothing in the letter takes it back.
Verse 18 leaves the wrong open rather than settling it. If he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything. Paul does not deny it, size it, or explain it away. He offers to cover it and moves on.
Verse 19 is a signature. I, Paul, write this with my own hand, I will repay it. That is a written undertaking for a debt that would not be his, in a letter addressed to a household and a church as well as to Philemon.
Questions
1 Paul says perhaps this is why Onesimus was away for a while. Why not say it for certain?
AnswerBecause he does not claim to know God's purpose for certain. He is at the center of his own argument, writing about why the whole thing may have happened, and he will not claim more than he has. The hedge stays in the letter and nothing afterward takes it back.
2 What is Philemon told to receive Onesimus as, and what is he not told to do?
AnswerAs a beloved brother, no longer as a slave. He is not commanded to free him, and the letter does not declare slavery finished. Paul puts two things into one man's hands that cannot comfortably be held together and leaves him holding both.
3 Paul says the brotherhood is both in person and in the Lord. What would keeping it to the Lord alone have looked like?
AnswerWarm words at the meeting and nothing different at home. A brother on the Lord's day and property on Monday morning. Paul closes that gap before Philemon has a chance to find it.
4 Is there something somebody owes you that you have been keeping count of? What does Paul do about the money here?
AnswerHe offers to take it onto himself. Charge it to my account, he writes, and then he picks up the pen so the promise is in his own handwriting. He never argues that nothing was owed. He signs for it and gets on with what he came to ask.
What This Means for Us
Charge it to my account. Paul does not establish the facts first, weigh the fault, or work out a fair share. He offers to pay whatever it comes to, in his own handwriting, in a letter a church will hear.
Most of our reconciling stalls in the exact place he skips. We want the ledger correct before anybody walks through a door, and the ledger is never going to be correct, so the door stays shut. Somebody absorbs the difference or nothing moves.
So think of a relationship where you are still waiting to be paid what you are owed. Work out what writing it off would cost you, and whether you could.
Prayer
Father, we keep careful accounts of what we are owed and call it fairness. Thank you for one who put his own name against a debt that was not his, and for the one who did it for all of us. Give us the freedom to absorb a cost and open a door. Amen.