Ephesians 6:1-4

Children and Fathers

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1Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

2“Honor your father and mother” (which is the first commandment with a promise),

3“that it may go well with you and that you may have a long life on the earth.”

4Fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath; instead, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Berean Standard Bible

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Paul addresses children directly: obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Children have a place in the church's life and a command of the Lord to hear for themselves. Obedience to parents is part of learning to follow Him.

He connects the command to the fifth commandment, to honor father and mother. He calls it the first commandment with a promise: that it may go well with them and they may live long on the earth. This expresses God's blessing on honoring parents; it does not let us judge a child's obedience by the length of that child's life.

The instruction to fathers is equally direct: do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Parental authority is therefore bounded. It must not become a source of needless humiliation, unpredictable anger, or impossible demands.

Discipline and instruction are meant to serve the child's growth toward the Lord. They are not tools for making a child carry a parent's frustration or fulfill a parent's unspoken ambitions. The command gives fathers responsibility for the atmosphere their authority creates.

Questions

1 Who does Paul address first in this household passage?

AnswerHe addresses children directly and tells them to obey their parents in the Lord. Children are included as responsible members of the Christian household.

2 What commandment does Paul quote?

AnswerHe quotes the command to honor father and mother, connecting family respect to Israel's covenant instruction.

3 What does Paul tell fathers not to do?

AnswerHe tells them not to provoke their children to wrath. Authority must not become needless anger, humiliation, or discouragement.

4 What positive responsibility does Paul give fathers?

AnswerThey are to bring their children up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord, directing them toward faithful life rather than parental control.

What This Means for Us

Children can obey the next reasonable instruction without waiting to be asked again. Listening, doing an assigned task and speaking respectfully are ordinary ways to honor parents in the Lord.

Fathers should consider how they correct a child. Clear instruction and patient discipline help a child learn; ridicule and unpredictable anger can provoke bitterness. When we have acted harshly, we can admit it and ask forgiveness. Obedience in the Lord never requires a child to participate in wrongdoing or conceal abuse; a child who is being harmed should tell a safe adult and seek help.

Prayer

Father, make our homes places of truth, safety, and patient instruction. Help children respond with wisdom and parents lead without provoking, so that every relationship points toward Christ. Amen.

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